No matter your age or stage in life, true confidence can be hard to come by. I find that my confidence is too often based on my circumstances, and therefore falls apart quickly when trouble or stress hits. But the Bible offers something much more eternal – confidence that is based not on our job, performance, appearance or approval from other people but based on God and who he is.
Know your signs
As a face is reflected in water, so the heart reflects the real person.
Proverbs 27:19 (NLT)
Our insides reflect who we really are.. We often don’t like to talk about or admit the real areas we feel insecure because insecurities cause us pain and embarrassment. But much like the warning lights on our automobile dashboard, certain thoughts and feelings should clue us in that we are deeply lacking confidence.
Sometimes it’s obvious when we don’t feel confident, but other times it’s not. Here are some common signs I’ve found in my life that help me identify my need for confidence:
- Being especially aware of what others around you have and I don’t (ie appearances, clothes, jobs, attention, etc.)
- My mood is affected when someone has something I don’t have
- I begin putting up walls to avoid getting hurt by those around me
- I assume the worst about others, because it feels too vulnerable to believe the best
- I don’t want to take any risks
- I get very angry when life doesn’t go my way, even if it’s out of my control.
Can you relate? Identifying warning signs is good and should not be avoided. Once we identify our symptoms, we can tackle the root of the problem and build the confidence we so deeply desire.
Fight with Scriptures
For though we walk (live) in the flesh, we are not carrying on our warfare according to the flesh and using mere human weapons.
For the weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood], but they are mighty before God for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds…
2 Corinthians 10:3-4 (AMP)
One definition of a “stronghold” is a place where a belief or cause is strongly defended or upheld. Do you have unhealthy strongholds in your mind? Thoughts about yourself or God that are not true?
Sometimes we have strongholds of unbelief in our hearts. We refuse to believe that the scriptures are true and that God chose us, will be with us, will answer our prayers, gives us mercy for our mistakes because of the cross, and has a great plan for our future. Instead, we believe that God doesn’t really care about our lives, that the world is better, and that God will make us miss out on our fun.
God’s weapons are powerful enough to destroy any stronghold of unbelief, pride, worldliness or fear that we may have built up in our hearts.
What lies do you believe about God? Write them down and then find scriptures that change your mind.
Focus on God, Not Yourself
We are confident of all this because of our great trust in God through Christ. It is not that we think we are qualified to do anything on our own. Our qualification comes from God.
2 Corinthians 3:4-5
One of the biggest things that steals my confidence is focusing too much on myself. God’s plan was never that we would be qualified to do anything alone. So, if we only look to our own talents and abilities we will naturally feel very insecure. We were designed to need God and to help other people only through the power of God in our lives.
When you feel troubled, insecure, or not confident to help people around you, how much do you pray? Or do you try to find a solution yourself?
What situations in your life are troubling you right now? Decide to pray about them every day instead of trying to figure out what to do. When you feel tempted to think about how much you are doing, stop and think about God and what He is doing.