She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.

Proverbs 31:25

You are smart, beautiful, visionary, confident, enjoying life, and you snagged the guy of your dreams. Sounds pretty good, right?  This is the Proverbs 31 woman. Despite what you may have heard about women in the Bible, God’s vision is for women to be confident, secure, and satisfied.

Below are three things we can learn from the Proverbs 31 woman to become more confident women ourselves.

Confident women care more about what’s inside than about their outward appearance.

She is energetic and strong, a hard worker.

Proverbs 31:17

Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last;  but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.

Proverbs 31:30

Have you ever walked by a car window and felt an irresistible urge to check out your reflection? Or felt self-conscious all day because of that unwanted blemish right in the middle of your chin? If so, you are aware of one of the universal truths of being a woman–no matter what age, our appearance matters to us, sometimes too much.

But another universal truth that the Bible points out in Proverbs 31 is that physical beauty does not last. Over the course of our lifetime we will gain and lose weight, gain wrinkles, and lose hair. The Bible wants us to see that a truly beautiful woman does not have to use her body for attention, but will have the kind of attractiveness that never fades.

It is a relationship with God that makes a woman attractive, strong, and confident. Her character is defined by who she is with God. Her energy is contagious. What is more attractive and admirable than a woman who is unshakeable?

Confident women inspire the men in their lives, instead of desperately craving their attention.

Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.

Proverbs 31:11-12

When we live to get attention, and compare and compete with other women to get more of that attention, we actually harm the people around us. Our motives get twisted; we look at men not as a relationship, but as a means to make us feel better. We look at women not as friends, but as competition. We are never able to get the relationships that we actually want, and end up hurting the people around us because we don’t view or treat them as people when our only goal is attention.

When we strive to live for things greater than attention, like a relationship with God or relationships with people, we no longer feel the need to crave or compete for attention. When we see that we have a purpose, like enriching other people’s lives, we create a higher standard for ourselves and no longer live for the purpose of others’ approval.

Confident women are known for their love.

She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy.

Proverbs 31:20

When we make efforts to shift the center of our world from us to God, the results are clear. When the focus is not on us, there is room in our hearts to care about other people, and we do things for others that we wouldn’t have normally done on our own.

Because her life is not centered around herself, the confident woman notices and loves the helpless and the needy; she opens her arms to those who have never felt that kind of love before. The only way we are capable of this kind of selfless, confident love is through a solid and daily relationship with God.

God knows the great things we can do and be when we are confident and close to him. We just need to do the spiritual work it takes to become these three qualities of the confident Proverbs 31 woman!

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